Destination

Yesterday, I was in town with yishi for my favourite chicken curry and a haircut. It seems like a century since I last hit town with her. My haircut from far east cost 30 bucks and my head feel so light right after. For a moment, I thought I was headless.

Bought nothing; just a talking flower from taka for my mummy. That’s for mother’s day, and my mum simply loves it!!! Although the flower that my brother bought is real while mine is fake, my love for mummy is genuine!! Will upload the picture of my talking flower later coz my bluetooth is not working now.

I was out again earlier today, and someone questioned me - what is it that you really want. In an instance, I felt lost, not because I don’t have a map, but because I don’t have a destination…

He mentioned that our life is like a ship in the ocean. We have to sail towards our destination. If we take too long in making a decision, we would eventually run out of fuel, and our ship can reach nowhere. Even if we have a destination, we might not make our way there smoothly. Our ship might capsize; we might meet pirates or even storms. Though some of these barriers are within our control, many are not.

Many a time, our destination does not only matter to us, but it also concerns the people around us - like our parents. We cannot possibly make a decision at the sake of their happiness. If I am to choose, I will rather be the one sacrificing than to see them feeling sad at the expense of my own selfish contentment. That is too cruel. But at the same time, isn’t that decision cruel towards me??

Almost every time I have to make a decision, I will allow 2 options, either a “yes” or a “no”. Now, that’s the most tedious part because my ship cannot come to a compromise on where I want my destination to be. The path that lies ahead is misty and hazy. I cannot foresee what awaits me, and thus I cannot decide where I should set my destination.

I understand that procrastinating is neither an option too. We all have a limit to our patience. There is a threshold limit and if we exceed that, everything dies. The ship capsizes.

Should I be selfish or selfless?? Where is my final destination??


A song by Fish Leong – 勇气 Courage